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Learning for Life: Cultivating a Student Spirituality
Week 3
Dining at the Grace Café
John DeBoer, Chaplain at Grand Valley State University
3.1 Dining at the Grace Café
“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast.” Ephesians 2:8-9
One of the great joys of life is sitting around a table with students enjoying some great food and conversation. Everyone is free to express their insight on many “life” issues and even some God questions are raised. Years ago, as we studied Ephesians, I began to think of God sitting around the table with us and involved in the conversation. We began calling these encounters “dining at God’s Grace Café.” It is a place where God affirms us and we affirm each other. There is no room for junk food. God encourages us to eat healthy. God reminds me that he will give me all that I need. We can bring anyone we want. In fact, we are encouraged to throw a party and invite as many as we can to the Grace Café. God even throws in a surprise now and then at unexpected times. Jesus himself invites us to that great meal and says “do it in remembrance of me.” Even if you struggle with real food issues, I hope you will find it helpful to dine at the Grace Café and experience all that God has to offer.
This is a place where we encourage each other to live in such a way that others can see that God is real in our everyday experiences. Great theological insights have been written on the backs of placemats and some even used in sermons. It is the Grace Café because God has made it clear that you have a new relationship with him due to his grace. You can be confident that you are sharing with a God who loves us. When was the last time you had some conversation in which you remind each other that God’s grace is bigger than even our biggest trial or negative circumstance? Are there times when God seems distant? Do you ever wonder if you really believe at all? Wherever you are in your walk with God, be intentional about sitting around one of the tables at the Grace Café and keep the conversation going or enjoy some silence in God’s presence. God says, “come” and check out some of the daily specials. Join me at one of my favorite hangouts: God’s Grace Café. It is a safe place where encouragement can be found, and you can sense the affirmation from God and the others who have gathered there.
Prayer: Thank you God for the promising menu of grace enough for all, and thank-you that we can share it with each other. Amen
Quote: “My grace is sufficient for you.” –God
3.2 God Affirms Us
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.” Ephesians 1:3
Do you remember a special person in your life that encouraged you when you needed it most? They are the ones who take the time to send a note, give a call, or just catch you in person. Paul reminds the people in Ephesus how special they are: blessed by God, chosen, and adopted as His children
Have you ever experienced a real “put-down?” What did you think about the person who said it? Most of us know the real hurt that often turns into anger and bitterness. We have had some helpful discussions on this at some of our student retreats. Students and staff also talked about when they initiated the put-down and how they wished they could take it back.
Conversation at the Grace Café is about affirmations as Paul says, “And in Him you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit.” It is easy to tear down but we are encouraged to build each other up. At the Grace Café there is no room for put-downs. It is a place where God says, “I love you.” where affirmation happens around the tables. John echoes this when he writes: “How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are.” (I John 3:1a).
I am encouraged by the many young adults who find their affirmation at the Grace Café and then move out to share God’s affirmation with others. Dining is about gaining the necessary energy to do what needs to be done. The work that student volunteers do with ministries and social causes reminds me that God continues to raise up those who want to live out God’s grace and affirmation.
Hear God again! Allow His words of affirmation to echo in your mind. Our university is GVSU. I remind each new student that it means God Values Students Unconditionally. There will always be those who feel the need to put you down. I hope that you and I can break that non-productive spiral by affirming each other just as God does at the Grace Café.
Prayer: Thank you Father for the affirming people you have sent in my life. Help me to see the needs and be affirming of others. Amen
Quote: “It doesn’t matter if you’re a frog or a pig or a bear or even a person. It doesn’t matter if you’re a big fish in a little pond or a small fish in a big pond—you’re you and you matter.” –Kermit the Frog
3.3 No Room For Junk Food
“…to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” –Ephesians 4:23-24
Life is all about choices. Have you ever made some really destructive ones? There is no room for junk food that messes up our lives. Paul knew junk food. He’d been there, done that. Not until God touched him did he realize his menu was a better option. Instead of destructive junk food, he found God’s menu was life giving. Junk food does nothing more than “gratify the cravings of our sinful nature, following its desires and thoughts” (Ephesians 2:3). I have students compile lists of junk food from the Bible. You may find it helpful. Phrases in Ephesians give us insight: “Followed the ways of the world,” “disobedience to God,” “separated from the life of God,” “hardening of their hearts,” and Ephesians 4:19: “Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.” You can add falsehood, uncontrolled anger, bitterness, unwholesome talk, rage, slander, “along with every form of malice” (Ephesians 4:31). Paul tells us to have nothing to do with those dark deeds but to live as children of light. Some students admit they’re junk food junkies. Paul writes about “what the disobedient do in secret.” Do you have secrets?
Life is about choices. Joshua knew that when he challenged God’s people after they wandered: “Choose you this day whom you will serve.” So you make menu choices: love or hatred, acceptance or cynicism, self-indulgence or service, compassion or revenge, forgiveness or bitterness, honesty or lies. You can add to the list.
Have you ever just said, “I’m going to indulge in some moral junk food?” I know I have spent valuable energy rationalizing some bad choices. God comes to us, “dearly loved children”, and keeps reminding us that light is a lot better than darkness. I believe many students really want to get rid of the moral junk food. I also know junk food is everywhere. We pray for each other that we may make good choices. “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good work” (Ephesians 2:10a). You and I only have so much energy. We can expend it rationalizing our love for junk food or by choosing God’s way. Life is about choices: “as for me and my student friends, we will seek to serve the Lord.”
Prayer: Dear God, give me the energy and desire to live as a child of your light. Amen
Quote: I just want to do God’s will…I’m not worried about anything. I’m not fearing any man.
–Martin Luther King, Jr. April 3, 1968
3.4 It’s All You Can Eat
“…that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” –Ephesians 3:19b
Students love to eat. At least once on our spring break service trips we have to stop at a pizza buffet. All the salad and any kind of pizza you want including dessert can bring culinary joy to most. Also, students knew someone else was picking up the tab. One year, 12 Japanese students worked with us at a Habitat site. They joined our group of 75 at the buffet. The food was great but the sharing was priceless despite the language barrier. We talked about a God who loves us so much that he keeps serving all these great things: Love with no limits, the riches of mercy, new life, forgiveness, blessings, salvation, and more.
In Ephesians 3, Paul prayed for them that they “may be rooted and established in love…to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ,” (v. 18-19a). He adds that incredible spiritual “all you can eat”—“that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God”(v. 19b). And God picks up the tab—“for it is by grace… a gift of God.”
Are you writing your own menu as you sing: “I’m going to have it my way?” We have a big God who provides all we need, on his timetable, in unexpected places and through unexpected people. God promises us that we will be filled.
In response, “sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything” (Ephesians 5:19b-20). It is perhaps a bit dangerous to talk about all you can eat in a world where so many go hungry. The greatest way to say thanks to God is to share—that abundance of food as well as the spiritual entrees from the Grace Café. Many students are committed to feeding the hungry and give their time and money. When God blesses us, he wants us to give thanks and recycle. We may recycle our blessings by sending money to CRWRC to help with the water project, working at a local food pantry, gleaners, or any ministry group in your area.
When you dine at the Grace Café, it’s all you can eat, give thanks and share. Are there any changes I need to make in my actions or attitude?
Prayer: Today I give thanks for your blessings in my life. Help me to see each day that you have blessed me to be a blessing to others. Amen.
Quote: “If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost, that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.”—H.D. Thoreau
3.5 Throw a Party, Bring Your Friends
“For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom his whole family in Heaven and on earth derives its name.” Ephesians 3:14-15
Michael W. Smith opens his book Friends with these words: “We’ve probably never met, but I wish we had. I wish we could kick back in a restaurant and just talk. I’d like to know where you’ve been and where you think you’re going, what has really hurt, what your dreams are, what your thoughts are about God.” I still hear his song “Friends” played on the radio now and then. You may be blessed with friends or you may be the loneliest person on campus or somewhere in between. Others may be praying desperately for a friend who will accept them for who they are.
Paul reminds us that as God’s people we are family and we ought to be open to those around us. As the song says, “and a friend will not say ‘never’ ‘cause the welcome will not end.” At mini-retreats at our home, often over 100 students attend for great food and conversation. Some know each other, but many do not. Students find a place to call home. That is exactly what God encourages. He wants the family that bears His name to be inclusive, to reach out, to be open to persons with many different characteristics and stories. You may be the person that needs to make a choice to become involved. Check out the campus ministry groups on your campus where students are committed to hospitality. You may be struggling in your academics. What a great thing if one of those other students could be your mentor. Who knows what God will do? You may be the person God is calling to reach out to others. I thank God for those Christian students who really have a heart for campus ministry. They volunteer to be part of the leadership team and serve wherever they are needed. As God’s people, let’s throw a party and invite others to dine at the Grace Café. It is a place that offers hope and affirmation. A place where no one has to eat alone. What an opportunity for each of us “to live a life of love just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us.” Are you open to the people God sends into your life? Are you open to those who may be reaching out to you?
Prayer: Oh God, help me to be a friend. Thank you for the special people in my live who encourage me. Amen.
Quote: “If loneliness is as prevalent as they say it is, then perhaps the greatest sin of our time is that someone should have to be lonely alone.” –T.S. Williams
3.6 God Will Surprise You at the Grace Café
“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.” Ephesians 3:20-21
Are you open to God’s surprises? How willing are you to grow, experiencing life in ways that you couldn’t imagine? We had about 100 students at the house for a mini-retreat. Of course that included great food, new people, and conversation about God’s Adventure Principles. It was an evening of dining at the Grace Café. We talked about taking risks and openness to God’s surprises. Some seemed ready to jump at every opportunity but others wanted to play it safe. Security for some had become the need to predict a controllable outcome. Students encouraged each other to risk travelling (on trips and in life) to places they had never been before. They realized it was more important to know God would travel with them than to know their exact destination.
This is about God who “is able to do more than we would ever ask or imagine.” At a high school graduation I challenged grads to eat more than the same old pizza: “just pepperoni, please.” We all know there is much more to life. Deep down we want to get out of any ruts we are in. God may throw something new on the menu and ask us to be open rather than respond with, “I don’t think so.” Paul is writing these Gospel words from prison. He challenges us also, to “make the most of every opportunity.”
Paul was not only open to God’s surprises, but shared these with a lot of other people. As God gives us “grace surprises,” we, too, can share those surprises with others. God can surprise you with inner strength to face a situation you didn’t think you could handle. When you disappoint Him, God keeps coming with love and forgiveness. I hear students’ stories of God blessing them in unexpected ways. How open are you to God’s surprises of grace? How ready are you to surprise others with that grace? On campus God gives us so many opportunities. I thank God for those students who dine at the Grace Café and are open to God’s surprises. God will surprise you!
Prayer: Dear God, help me to be open to your ‘grace surprises’. Help me see how I can share the Grace Café, and give me the courage to share your invitation with others. Amen
Quote: “There is no box made by either God or man out of which we can’t blow the top and flatten the sides into a dance floor on which to celebrate life.” –from Alive Now
3.7 Never Forget
“I pray that out of his glorious riches the Father may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith.” Ephesians 3:16
We have traveled with various students over the years to the concentration camp at Dachau. On leaving, you see little signs in numerous languages: “never forget.” Some students don’t like history and others find it meaningful. We need to remember so it won’t happen again. My dad served in the Dutch army for 15 years. I was born during World War II and Nazi occupation. My mother shared with students some of the family stories of war including sneaking out at night to outrun the Nazis to get milk and food for us kids. Those humble meals loaded with love were in many ways like eating at the Grace Café. She shared her faith in her big God who promised that no matter what the circumstances He would always be with us. Some students cried, others responded with love and admiration, others, who had lots of questions about God, listened intently. My student friends know that she is my hero. I know too that the God who saw so many through the darkness of war still watches over me.
Jesus wants us to remember. He knows the distractions that will come your way. He knows about the campus voices that would seek to sway your allegiance to Him. He knows academic success might lead you to self-sufficiency instead of service. He knows you need a reminder of His presence and all He has done for you. He wants us to do it together and remember, “There is one body.” We remember as we join others in that humble meal of bread and wine. As Paul prays: “I pray that you being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge” (Ephesians 3:17b-19a).
One of the early questions to come up when we plan worship services with our student team is: “When are we going to have communion?” This is the finest meal at the Grace Café. Are you cashing in on the full benefits of all that Jesus has done for you? Are you stuck in sins of the past that are wearing you out? Jesus comes in love and says, “Do this in remembrance of me!” Let us do it together as the body of Christ. We gather as God’s forgiven people ready to accept and forgive each other.
Prayer: Thank-you Jesus for the signs of bread and wine to help me remember your love and forgiveness for us all. Thank you for the invitation to gather with others to share your grace in communion. Amen
Quote: “This do in remembrance of me.” –Jesus
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